I've written before about my journey from CEO to Nobody -- an arduous process of shedding my prior role and stripping my identity down to something more fundamental after the sale of the company I founded.
That process completed itself sometime this past year and I write this now as I embark on what feels like yet another chapter of my journey -- a full six years post-sale.
I don't know when this process of going from CEO to Nobody concluded.
What I do know is that from the foundation of being fully open to what life is offering me (a la The Surrender Experiment) I'm overwhelmed by opportunity each day. There are investments to be made, communities to join, coaching gigs to engage in, creative projects to jam on, and more.
I don't feel that I'm in charge of directing these opportunities.
I'm not the driver.
And what a relief that is.
These projects flow to me and I've taken to surrendering to them by saying yes. This kind of surrender is of course made possible by all the privileges I have in this life, as well as a bunch of luck and hard work.
There have been several juicy Surrender Projects that were poignant this past year that I haven't shared much about publicly. Here's a quick summary:
Surrender Project #1: Coaching CEOs, executives and their teams
After selling my company, perhaps like any founder, I thought I would either retire permanently or build something new. I struggled mightily with both.
I envisioned myself as still the quarterback even though I had no team to lead.
That was painful.
There was nowhere to channel this energy -- no matter how long I sat meditating in a monastery or starving in the desert on survival courses, or challenging myself by building pyramids at Burning Man.
My 2022 build project at Burning Man: PlayAlchemist Camp & Pyramids
This CEO part of me wouldn't quiet down. I felt I'd failed to move on.
Ultimately, I was naive and didn't understand there was a middle way.
And this middle way I didn't figure out. It was figured out for me.
Several friends and fellow YPO members pushed me to coach them. One said "I need your brain and way of seeing things, and I don't trust coaches who haven't built a company. Perhaps you're my coach."
So -- with a bit of an arm twist my world changed and I started down the path of coaching CEOs. I've been doing this now for a year and have a killer roster of clients who I can see transforming before my eyes. Some have multibillion dollar global companies and others are startups in growth mode. What they all have in common is an insatiable desire to be better leaders. Growing leaders is something I've always done and feel deeply is a part of my personal mission and skill set.
The best part is it feels natural to me. It doesn't feel like work and I don't feel compelled to build a "coaching business". This is a personal practice -- perhaps somewhat of a calling you could say.
I'm no longer holding back this ability because of my own self-limiting thoughts related to future quarterbacking...
Surrender Project #2: Became an expert leadership facilitator through YPO Forums
During my career as an agency owner I became adept at facilitating all manner of creative and innovation-focused brainstorming sessions/conferences for Fortune 500s. I did this for the CEOs of Yahoo and Walmart at Davos and for important institutions like the US Army and World Bank. I deeply missed this work post-exit.
So, in 2019 when my YPO chapter (the largest in the world with 250 CEO members) asked me to join the board as the Forum Officer, I saw an opportunity to reinvigorate this practice and learn how to facilitate groups of CEO Forums with as much mastery as I could muster. Over the past three years, I've started ten YPO forums where ~8 CEOs get together each month to dig deep into business, personal and family issues. I spend about 8 hours with them over their first two meetings to get them connected and gelling -- and then I'm on call for tune ups as needed.
Through this experience I've realized I absolutely love facilitating leadership workshops and retreats and have added this to my CEO and executive coaching service offering. Recently, the founders of a new stealth CEO network of 150 members asked me to be their founding facilitator and coach -- so three times a month I facilitate a three hour meeting for groups of 8 to help them get the most out of their business endeavors, while getting a deep look at the personal issues that may be holding them back from peak performance.
I now train other coaches for this network in how best to facilitate CEO groups.
Surrender Project #3: I joined UP.Partners as a Venture Partner
I credit (or blame) my buddy Cyrus for pulling me out of early retirement as he was the first person to say "okay enough with this being retired thing, I need your help."
So, last summer when he called to ask for help in launching his new $230m fund and associated summit focused on all things mobility I said
"please don't ask me to do this, but if you do, of course I'll help. And no you can't pay me."
That "yes" precipitated a flurry of activity while getting the fund and summit stood up. It's been lovely to work in a VC context for the first time; vetting deals, and doing what I love most -- helping portfolio companies with their hairy problems.
Jamming in the studio on Up Summit w/ Cyrus
Conclusion
As with most of my posts, the audience is founders, CEOs and post-exit folks who are navigating similar life transitions as I have been. To this group I have a few final thoughts and media recommendations:
- 6 years post-sale and I'm now feeling like the prior role is really behind me. Someone once said 7 years was the average and I didn't believe them. It takes a long time to reboot/refresh post exit for some of us.
- I realize I'll never have one thing I do, when someone asks "what do you do". I have so many roles: husband, gardener, coach, real estate developer, VC, hospice volunteer and more. What I do is attend to these roles as I see fit and necessary. That's my job.
- I read so much these days the content I'm drawn to is almost exclusively Zen or something related to coaching/personal development. Here are a few picks you might find interesting, that I've found impactful to my process:
TOP PICK: From Strength to Strength: Finding Success, Happiness, and Deep Purpose in the Second Half of Life
- Trillion Dollar Coach: The Leadership Playbook of Silicon Valley's Bill Campbell
- NLP: The Essential Guide to Neuro-Linguistic Programming
- The Psychology of Money: Timeless Lessons on Wealth, Greed, and Happiness
- Burn Rate: Launching a Startup and Losing My Mind
- The Infinite Game
- Beqoming: Everything You Didn't Know You Wanted
- Island
- All Things Shining: Reading the Western Classics to Find Meaning in a Secular Age
- The 15 Commitments of Conscious Leadership: A New Paradigm for Sustainable Success
- Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life