Today, after more than 12 years, the company I founded no longer exists except in scattered remains of content strewn across the internet, and of course in the hearts and minds of those who engaged with iStrategyLabs (ISL) in some way. It's been 18 months since my retirement from ISL, and I thought I'd processed all my emotions related to it, mostly by trying to kill my ego, but I wasn't prepared for ISL to be shuttered so soon as I watched impotent from afar.
I know that the 30+ person team that was just laid off will find great gigs in no time, as they're some of the most talented designers, developers and strategists not only in DC but the country. But of course it stings to know that they've just been let go into a holiday break. I know how it feels. I was laid off in 2007 from an agency and I was scared, with only a few months of living expenses in the bank to keep me afloat. Three days after that layoff I started iStrategyLabs. It sucks to get laid off, but I know that so many people that worked at ISL have already gone on to bigger and better things, and this crew will as well.
I should note that I was REALLY mad at the CEO and management of the agency that laid me off. I was mad for years. And I'm sure many of you are mad at me as well. This is not an attempt to change that. I'm writing to add just a bit more closure to this very real closure that happened this past week. And as you know, I can be selfish/self-focused so perhaps this closure is just for me. I appreciate you reading this anyway, and for considering my apology:
> "To all of you, I'd like to say this: I'm sorry. I didn't expect things to work out this way post-acquisition."
So for sake of context, and perhaps my own catharsis, here's a little bit more of what happened: by 2016, we were on top of our game, winning awards, growing revenue by 100% year over year, and we had 7 companies that wanted to buy us. I thought that what we needed to get to the next level in this industry was to join a global network that had the ability to open doors for us everywhere. So I sold the company to JWT/WPP and it's made a lot of people unhappy.
I didn't know that after a 9 year streak of growing and winning, and feeling like a resounding success, that I would begin the process of failing. Not you…me. I began failing.
I tried and tried for two years to grow ISL after the acquisition, and when we lost our two biggest clients within months of each other it was becoming clear that I was not going to be able to stem the tide that had turned against us. Clients were in-sourcing their social content, Google and Facebook's in-house creative teams were giving away creative work for free in order to get media dollars from clients, and our juicy retainers were being challenged by upstart digital shops with lower prices, just like we'd challenged the establishment during our own ascension to a prosperous ~100 person shop. At that point I didn't know what else I could do. We were now losing pitches because we were "too big", or the politics of getting a part of a global account were just beyond my ability to navigate.
> "I failed at attempting to play a bigger game. Icarus flew too close to the sun…and the collateral damage is real."
Fast forward to today where ISL is no more. I'm sure your trust in me, or whatever respect you had has been greatly reduced. So, for the first time in my life I really do feel like a failure. Of course it's easy to say "no no, you did so much and it was so great for so long etc. etc." But the goal I'd set out for myself was to build a company that would out live me, and at least prosper greatly after I no longer owned or ran it.
Why do other agencies prosper post acquisition but we didn't? Why did I hit a wall in year 10, rather than break through it? I thought I was such a great CEO!? And now, I'm not quite sure what I could have, or should have done. If we hadn't sold, wouldn't the outcome have been just the same, only perhaps the doors might have stayed open a little longer?
These are questions that I've explored over and over, and the emotional components go very deep. Too deep for a blog post. If you find yourself in NYC sometime soon, reach out so we can chat. I'd like to hear how little you think of me so I can grow through hearing your truth. Or how much you loved ISL; that would be nice too.
Peter now works as an executive coach and facilitator for CEOs, founders, and leadership teams, including many working through the same kinds of post-exit questions this piece raises.